- Messages
- 5,433
Went to fit a toilet seat to a back to wall WC tiled all around.
Thought - not a big problemo. Prob a pain to get in and out, bit of making good, no real faff.
Then thought, I paid for it - might as well use it. Whipped out the Crystal Ball.
Good job I did because what awaited me was: Twist the push button off the top of the cistern lid and the cheap nasty rod type flush valve inside will literally fall to pieces. And sit there like an indecipherable mess of plastic tat. Then you'll find out the cistern is FULL of that coloured ball liquid stuff that stains your hands purple. Like 3 inches of semi-solid goo at the bottom - in which will be swimming the destroyed remains of a once proud Eastern European - possibly Soviet - flush-valve with built in "self-destruct on descovery" function.
The WC won't have an iso, nor any room to fit one and the customer won't know where their internal stopcock is so water will have to be turned off in the street. So you won't be able to wash out the cistern, or wash the purple off your hands, or arms, or off the toilet seat or floor where it was oozing it's way about - until it's all reconnected. So you'll have to install new flush valve and hope the goo won't prevent it sealing.
The bolts for the old toilet seat won't - of course - undo so you'll have to cut them off. The pan connector (hidden up until removing loo of course) has been installed badly and there's is feces leaking out. Mixed with purple goo it's quite modern art, really. Then it turns out - once you would have got it back in place with great difficulty the inlet will stop working too! So you'll need to change that as well. Finally you'll get the water back on and spend about 15 minutes removing purple goo from every thing in sight.
But luckily the customer will come in after, look pleased and say "Ooh it's looks like nobody has even been here." And plus, since you gave a range instead of a fixed price you will at least be compensated fully for your time.
So I thought 'Thanks for the warning Crystal Ball, but I shall proceed nonetheless!'
Thought - not a big problemo. Prob a pain to get in and out, bit of making good, no real faff.
Then thought, I paid for it - might as well use it. Whipped out the Crystal Ball.
Good job I did because what awaited me was: Twist the push button off the top of the cistern lid and the cheap nasty rod type flush valve inside will literally fall to pieces. And sit there like an indecipherable mess of plastic tat. Then you'll find out the cistern is FULL of that coloured ball liquid stuff that stains your hands purple. Like 3 inches of semi-solid goo at the bottom - in which will be swimming the destroyed remains of a once proud Eastern European - possibly Soviet - flush-valve with built in "self-destruct on descovery" function.
The WC won't have an iso, nor any room to fit one and the customer won't know where their internal stopcock is so water will have to be turned off in the street. So you won't be able to wash out the cistern, or wash the purple off your hands, or arms, or off the toilet seat or floor where it was oozing it's way about - until it's all reconnected. So you'll have to install new flush valve and hope the goo won't prevent it sealing.
The bolts for the old toilet seat won't - of course - undo so you'll have to cut them off. The pan connector (hidden up until removing loo of course) has been installed badly and there's is feces leaking out. Mixed with purple goo it's quite modern art, really. Then it turns out - once you would have got it back in place with great difficulty the inlet will stop working too! So you'll need to change that as well. Finally you'll get the water back on and spend about 15 minutes removing purple goo from every thing in sight.
But luckily the customer will come in after, look pleased and say "Ooh it's looks like nobody has even been here." And plus, since you gave a range instead of a fixed price you will at least be compensated fully for your time.
So I thought 'Thanks for the warning Crystal Ball, but I shall proceed nonetheless!'
