what have you seen on jobs

[erj]

Worked at a house with a big garden, (big) and they had 6 raindeer. Got me thinking what have you seen on jobs that made stop and think wow!

 

[Mutha]

Customer in a bikini.

 

[Killy Bing]

Worked on quite a large country house with a a few rads...83 cast iron ones to be precise !! Oh that wasn't the remarkable bit!

It has two secret tunnels! One leading down the river and another to the local pub cellar !!

 

[Roger Welton]

Lots of things I wish I never had!

 

[Best]

Customer in a bikini.

Male or female?

 

[mountainman]

It has two secret tunnels! One leading down the river and another to the local pub cellar !!

So, you have worked in Croppie's house then!

 

[Dotty]

You buy one modest little 17 bedroom neo georgian mansion..........

 

[deandive]

tarantulas, thought it was an unused fish tank, till the cust asked me if I was afraid of spiders

 

[pierrot]

Knocked on a door to a 1 bed council flat, geezer says do you mind pets, I say no not a problem thinking cat, dog etc.
sitting in the lounge in the middle of the floor is a lizard which is 12 foot long.
the tongue must have been another foot long flicking in and out.

 

[hammers4spanner]

lord lucan

 

[Billy Bob Bob]

custard, 20-25 yr old female,very hot,pump shagged in her ferroli,came in in her underwear,could we come to some sort of agreement on the bill? every morale fiber in my brain screamed get in there son,however i love my mrs and shes hot anyway,so just told her i am married and she pays cash,she was not happy though told the wife what happened,she said where does she live i will kill her the@+@@@,welsh women can be a bit fiesty

 

[pipefitter]

A few years ago I went to a flat where it seemed a couple of fellas lived & they had a public loo set-up in there living room..loo & sink in a cubicle with no door & a condom machine on the wall ...I couldn't get out quick enough haha the things people get upto

 

[deandive]

Gasman if she calls again il go round for you, ive not been doing much servicing lately be good to keep my hand in ;-)

 

[plumber0808]

I worked in a lottery winners 13million win. Apparently everyone hated them as they were a bunch of dossers then came up trumps. They had everything living the dream.

 

[Keefy]

I could write a book of the strange things I've encountered, most of them are from the same Wigan council estate where I spent 3 months doing upgrades. I'll mention just a couple...

Changing rad valves in a bedroom and the mother came in, got in the bed with her little Yorkshire Terrier and clearly began playing with herself. The pink vibrator which had been on the bedoom floor earlier had also mysteriously vanished, presumably with the poor dog.
Same house had a huge rabbit, in a tiny birdcage, on the kitchen worktop next to a bloody chopping board.

One house was completely covered from floor to ceiling with tigers. Fake tiger skin rugs, pictures of tigers, ornamental tigers, tiger pattern towels and dressing gowns, bed covers - I think you get the idea, probably had a box of Frosties cornflakes in the cupboard too.

Another house was the same story but this time with Elvis everywhere and the ceiling wasn't spared as even that had flags and posters stapled to it.

When I was working on that estate I thought what a great piece of TV it would make if I had a camera crew following me around for a reality show.

 

[Mrs Tara Plumbi]

custard, 20-25 yr old female,very hot,pump shagged in her ferroli,came in in her underwear,could we come to some sort of agreement on the bill? every morale fiber in my brain screamed get in there son,however i love my mrs and shes hot anyway,so just told her i am married and she pays cash,she was not happy though told the wife what happened,she said where does she live i will kill her the@+@@@,welsh women can be a bit fiesty

Mr TP tells me that there are a lot of customers out there like this - he has seen quite a few - i am not at liberty to state whether he has taken up any of the offers
When he worked for a big company they used to put a warning of the database that certain properties require 2 engineers - a chaperone for safety!

 

[Barry98]

I'd of thought send two round would mean there VIP customers

 

[R1CKY]

custard, 20-25 yr old female,very hot,pump shagged in her ferroli,came in in her underwear,could we come to some sort of agreement on the bill? every morale fiber in my brain screamed get in there son,however i love my mrs and shes hot anyway,so just told her i am married and she pays cash,she was not happy though told the wife what happened,she said where does she live i will kill her the@+@@@,welsh women can be a bit fiesty

Can you pass her my details please. I have no morals.

A customer once answered the door holding a Meerkat, that was a strange one!

 

[Alpha man]

Customer in a bikini.

Did you get pictures?????

 

[stevetheplumber]

ive had a naked mental health woman a flat full of snakes wall to wall piles of newspapers with tunnels walls with two inches of grease and filth
on the flipside ive worked in mansions and manor houses tina turner actually has the be from mad max in her london home

 

[moogwai]

Rooms full of cannabis plants, a hairy growler on a heather lookalike from eastenders, various toys in a house full of student nurses, a floater in a bath, wallets in cisterns just to name a few!!

 

[CES]

a chrome plated acrow-prop cunningly disguised as a lap dancing pole complete with carpeted platform in the middle of the living room of a Glasgow flat.

 

[Atouchofgas]

A dead body!

 

[ne1ls0n]

was working in a hairdressers/spa fitting out a bathroom and went round the back to turn water off, a door opened then a naked girl about 20s walked out just having a spray tan done and went into the room across the corridor. said hello and carried on as if everything was normal.

 

[Keefy]

A dead body!

Had that experience too. Also thought I'd found a dead body in a sheltered accommodation flat after letting myself in to what I thought was a vacant flat to change the bath and basin taps. Thought it was strange that the 'empty' flat was fully furnished but got on and did the job anyway.
Once I was done I had a little look around because something felt strange and there was a 'body' lying face down on the bed, knees on the floor so I told the scheme warden what I'd found and it turned out she'd given me the wrong set of keys and the fella was drunk - as usual.

She told me later that he'd woken up and found Jesus had changed his taps.