what have you seen on jobs

[Deleted member 2053]

Guy who had called me out answerng the door wearing a dress. Seems a bit tame compared with some of your exploits but it freaked me.

 

[Resolute]

Did a job in a HA flat where the tenant was wearing skimpy clothes and told me all about blokes breaking in to steal her underwear. She was rough as and touched in the head.

 

[plumber0808]

The biggest collection of **** I've seen in my life in a bedroom, the man was ancient, It was piled high mags DVDs everything. He did not give a toss that I was in there, I felt more awkward than him.

I was in there changing the valves. The longest valve change ever.

 

[plumber0808]

P.Orn

 

[Keefy]

Felt sorry for one HA customer, bit of a wino, he only had a TV and a kitchen chair placed in front of it - NOTHING else.

 

[moogwai]

I had a smack head ask if i'd finished with some 1 1/2" waste pipe whilst I was changing his bath.....i walked into his kitchen to turn the water back on and he was using it to chase his dragon!!! I'll never forget the horrible stench of heroin smoke!

 

[villa_tom]

I had a smack head ask if i'd finished with some 1 1/2" waste pipe whilst I was changing his bath.....i walked into his kitchen to turn the water back on and he was using it to chase his dragon!!! I'll never forget the horrible stench of heroin smoke!

Its horrible isn't it.

When I did my apprenticeship I worked in a home where a bloke was doing this. I was young and naive and never knew what he was doing.

The bloke I was with threatened him and told him to stop.

The smell is awful though.

 

[turnpin]

An English Bulldog called Precious who wore a jewelled collar and a pair of ladie's drawer's as the owner was afraid she would mark the floor in his new flat as she was on heat regards turnpin:27:

 

[SimonG]

*****'s, **** and bush.

 

[lame plumber]

*****'s, **** and bush.

sums up several years in the trade quite well

 

[Resolute]

Not seen any *****'s, **** or bush!

 

[kay-jay]

I had a smack head ask if i'd finished with some 1 1/2" waste pipe whilst I was changing his bath.....i walked into his kitchen to turn the water back on and he was using it to chase his dragon!!! I'll never forget the horrible stench of heroin smoke!

Has a smell all of its own doesn't it? most unpleasant...

 

[SimonG]

Not seen any *****'s, **** or bush!

There's time

The *****'s were big, the bush was horrible and the tit's were a treat.

 

[stevetheplumber]

i forgot hows about a ***** shaped shower head in a gay mans flat suppose he liked to keep the playground clean

 

[on31ll]

Went to a house to change a radiator then when filling up system need to bleed radiator in garage i didnt even know about ! Man says give me two minutes ! He comes back with a pole and a bin lid that he had made into a sheild ! Opened the door to garage the moisture hits me its like the amazon in there and he jumps on this huge python ! Lets just say i dont know to this day if that radiator is fully bled !

Also went to a huge house in knutsford man opened the door filing his nails ! Went into back garden he said the rabbits will leave you alone ! Well i swear to god these rabbits where the size of rottweilers ! He was having them imported from somwhere i think germany ! They where huge on steroids i think !

Also working with one lad in this house in bedroom ***** on floor he was messing round screaming look at it ! And he picked it up and we heard the lady come upstaires as he puts it down the batterys go flyin everywhere ! We tryed hard keeping a straight face speakin to her !

 

[on31ll]

I havent seen no bush either i dont think ! Although i read somwhere on the forum a user got caught talking a picture once ! I still want to see the picture !

 

[Ollieg]

Bush. ******. Crack no smack. Guy used my big chisel / screwdriver to chase someone down the street and then said thanks for letting him use it. Lady answered her door with no top on as if it was normal (probably was on broad water farm).

Last but not least. Man shows me photos of wife in every position with all the toys hanging out and asks if I wanna go.... Worse than Heather Trott. I had the gas valve out of their potterton puma and couldn't get the new one in fast enough.
All true, and form working for Haringey and camden council.
The good old days

 

[Ollieg]

There's so much more too.

 

[Mutha]

Male or female?

Oh female, good memory....er... back in few minutes................

 

[codcutter]

Reminds me

---

of a "job" a couple of years ago

Got a call to clear a blocked toilet, told customer i would be there before lunch the next day.
10:30 a.m myself and apprentice knock on front door
"Who is it?????
Plumber
You're early
No, it's before lunch
Hang on a minute"

Rattling of chains (lots) and the front door opened by bloke who looks more camp than boy scout jamboree. Going through door notice only one security chain, oh well

Go into bathroom, bog is to the brim so decide on a bottle of strong drain cleaner (didn't seem to do much, bearing in mind this stuff will strip chrome)
Ask if there is an access to soil stack from another room, yes in kitchen cupboard comes reply.
Wander into lounge to see matress on floor, more chains than the cargo deck of a North Sea ferry and a **** off ***** the size of my forearm with clenched fist.......and blokes partner looking hurriedly dressed and as if he's been dragged through a hedge backwards
oh well whatever floats yer boat i suppose
Can't gain access to soil so send lad to van for plunger, then plunge bog to clear it.
Grab the shower hose to wash plunger and tidy up the bog only to find an attachment on the end obviously designed for clearing anal passages, needs must so use it........... then claim my £80 and leave. Once outside apprentice says WTF, and we both burst out laughing when he says "Glad you didn't send me on my own"

Odd world we live in

 

[Dotty]

The way this one's going I'd best move it to the Arms.....

 

[moogwai]

Its horrible isn't it.

When I did my apprenticeship I worked in a home where a bloke was doing this. I was young and naive and never knew what he was doing.

The bloke I was with threatened him and told him to stop.

The smell is awful though.

Yeah made me feel sick, wouldve asked him to stop but you never know which way theyll turn when theyre on that stuff!