Agony Uncle

[tamz]

As a man of the world i'll offer advice on anything.
Test me :smile:

 

[lame plumber]

As a bloke with a tiny winkle, how have you managed all these years with the ladies?

 

[kozak1968]

[He never goes off half cockedQUOTE=lame plumber;611740]As a bloke with a tiny winkle, how have you managed all these years with the ladies?[/QUOTE]

 

[Billy Bob Bob]

dear uncle tam,
there is a bloke on the forum who may be inbred with a flipper and a tail,hes from devon, is he a poor soul or a lucky ******* with all this torrential flooding

 

[lame plumber]

now who's having a go at Tamz accusing him of having half a cock

 

[tamz]

My winkle size is adequate for my needs and has never hamperd my efforts to get aquainted with the ladies in fact it can lead to more adventurous encounters in the ladies attempt to get that extra ¼".

 

[lame plumber]

dont need fins, Ive got a landy (you set me up to say that didnt you GM )

 

[Killy Bing]

Dear tamz, if you had slept with a forum members daughter, who is based in the derby area.

Said daughter has asked you to go up and stay with her.
would you risk it or break contact.....

 

[Rickster123]

Dear uncle Tamz,

id like to watch boxing tonight on sky sports but my mrs wants to watch some sort of ice dancing, opera singing celebrity ****e instead. How do I get to watch the boxing and still have a chance of abit of loving later?

thanks in advance!

 

[lame plumber]

Is there anyway you can get Wales towed over to Ireland please? they may be very sulky in 10 minutes or so

 

[Rickster123]

Dear tamz, if you had slept with a forum members daughter, who is based in the derby area.

Said daughter has asked you to go up and stay with her.
would you risk it or break contact.....

Forget my problem! Lets hear all about this!

 

[iain85]

Dear tamz, if you had slept with a forum members daughter, who is based in the derby area.

Said daughter has asked you to go up and stay with her.
would you risk it or break contact.....

pics needed first for any meaningful advice to be forthcoming.

 

[Billy Bob Bob]

Dear tamz, if you had slept with a forum members daughter, who is based in the derby area.

Said daughter has asked you to go up and stay with her.
would you risk it or break contact.....

who is it then?

 

[tamz]

I need to eat

 

[AlexGas]

...

 

[Masood]

pics needed first for any meaningful advice to be forthcoming.

You want pics of Billy with his todger out?

 

[Killy Bing]

pics needed first for any meaningful advice to be forthcoming.

You want pics of Billy with his todger out?

I had to delete those photos first.
he enjoyed the rest of what was on the phone.

 

[Ermintrude]

Dear uncle tams.

I'm worried about billy. He's obsessed with tools . Think he has probably had a 'special' time with a milwaukiee pipe expander, whilst wearing a red heated cot and using an m18 inspection camera to perform a self inflicted colonoscopy? just worried about the face painted wee man!

 

[Ermintrude]

Plus I don't think his chargers have been pat tested!

 

[gasmanrob]

I'd risk it all day long..

 

[Dotty]

Dear Uncle Tamz,

A short arsed forum member keeps sending me pics of a young lady with her baps out. I'm suddenly worried she might live in Derby...........

 

[Irish]

Croppie do you have proof of this?? Otherwise this could be considered slander I think the said photos should be displayed

 

[Killy Bing]

Dear Uncle Tamz,

A short arsed forum member keeps sending me pics of a young lady with her baps out. I'm suddenly worried she might live in Derby...........

That was one posted by a random "facebook famous" girl

popped up on the news feed and thought you would appreciate it

 

[Killy Bing]

Dear uncle tams.

I'm worried about billy. He's obsessed with tools . Think he has probably had a 'special' time with a milwaukiee pipe expander, whilst wearing a red heated cot and using an m18 inspection camera to perform a self inflicted colonoscopy? just worried about the face painted wee man!

Reminds me, i have another deal to post up!!

 

[AlexGas]

Dear uncle tams.

just worried about the face painted wee man!

The paint on the face could be Milwaukee Expander Cone Grease…
Available from all good app stores...