a monday pick me up contains adult humour

[turnpin]

A mate of mine got in a packed lift and let one rip.....it was so wrong on all level's.....lol regards Turnpin

 

[turnpin]

Same mate got in a lift and said to the pretty young thing beside him can I smell your fanny ....she gave him a dirty look and said certainly not........must be your feet then he replied...lol regards Turnpin:smile5:

 

[kay-jay]

For sale
Mwb ford transit
120k miles
Good runner
Hardly any rusthttp://cloud.tapatalk.com/s/57d84bcc1c71f/FB_IMG_1473792848806.jpg?

 

[Best]

For sale
Mwb ford transit
120k miles
Good runner
Hardly any rusthttp://cloud.tapatalk.com/s/57d84bcc1c71f/FB_IMG_1473792848806.jpg?

Has been rammed up the rear though!

 

[kay-jay]

Has been rammed up the rear though!

Comes with a roadside service!

 

[kay-jay]

Comes with a roadside service!

And the backdoors have taken a battering

 

[Dotty]

Like any one of you would say no to that cushion. ....

 

[ShaunCorbs]

Go on own up whose downloaded it

 

[Best]

Go on own up whose downloaded it

:book: Okay, I copied it, but only for research and passing the joke on.

 

[Best]

This is the Italian Minister Maria Elena Boschi, signing up for her new Government position.
In my opinion, quite the wrong choice of shoe colour to wear with that suit for such an occasion.

 

[turnpin]

This is the Italian Minister Maria Elena Boschi, signing up for her new Government position.
In my opinion, quite the wrong choice of shoe colour to wear with that suit for such an occasion.

View attachment 27361

Keep your eye on that rear Admiral......Lol ..regards Turnpin:smilielol5:

 

[oz-plumber]

I would have expected a 'Tramp Stamp' as a minimum.

I hope for her sake she learns from this

 

[stani]

 

[turnpin]

Young fella go's into a chemist and ask's for a packet of condom's pay's and give the man behind the counter a big smile and laugh's as he leave's......this go's on for three day's....on the third day as he leave's the chemist say's to his assistant follow him and let me know where he go's......on his return the chemist say's well.....round your house came the reply......lol regards Turnpin:smilielol5:

 

[Atouchofgas]

You can now get insurance for sex in the UK!

So make sure you get the correct insurance for the sex you are having.

Please find a list of companies below catering for most tastes:-


Sex with your wife - Legal & General

Sex on the telephone - Direct Line

Sex with your partner - Standard Life

Sex with someone different - Go Compare

Sex with a lady of generous proportions - More Than

Sex on the back seat of a car - Sheila's Wheels

Sex with a prostitute - Commercial Union

Sex with your maid - Employer's Liability

Sex with an OAP - Saga

Sex resulting in pregnancy - General Accident


and finally


Sex with a transvestite - Confused.com



Make sure you are adequately covered! Or should that read make sure you adequately covered

 

[Paulplumb]

An old boy asks his mate if he knows anyone who will murder his wife. His mate says sure Gino will do it. Gino turns up and says I'll kill your wife, I'll shoot right under the titty. The old boy says I want her dead not kneecapped.

 

[Howsie]

https://www.facebook.com/onthetools/videos/1795451497407395/

 

[Masood]

All the organs of the body were having a meeting,
Trying to decide who was the one in charge.
"I should be in charge," said the brain, "Because I run all the body's systems, so without me nothing would happen."
"I should be in charge," said the blood, "Because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you'd all waste away."
"I should be in charge," said the stomach," Because I process food and give all of you energy."
"I should be in charge," said the legs, "because I carry the body wherever it needs to go."
"I should be in charge," said the eyes, "Because I allow the body to see where it goes."
I should be in charge," said the rectum, "Because I'm responsible for waste removal."
All the other body parts laughed at the rectum
And insulted him,
So in a huff, he shut down tight.
Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache,
The stomach was bloated,
The legs got wobbly,
The eyes got watery,
And the blood was toxic..
They all decided that the rectum should be the boss
.
The Moral of the story?
Even though the others do all the work...
An Arse Hole is usually in charge!!!

 

[Masood]

 

[Howsie]

https://www.facebook.com/NegDupreeOfficial/videos/10154592183336385/

 

[stani]

 

[turnpin]

View attachment 27374

Perhaps it should say .....Good but no cigar..lol regards Turnpin:sifone:

 

[Billy Bob Bob]

Purposeful photo ?Wonder how many of you will click on enlarge picture qBeauty Removable Waterproof Temporary Tattoo Butterfly Tattoo Body Art Sticker | eBay

 

[stani]

I cannot tell a lie, I did.

 

[stani]