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things a gas engineer / plumber would never say

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croppie said:
thank Gawd, I thought it was just me!
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We're only human, its allowed. Best one i ever had was going round the rooms to bleed the radiators youngish girl probably about 23ish had black leggings on and said "oh do you want me to bleed that one?, yeah go for it" because it was behind the bed jumped up on the bed with her arse facing me, seen straight through the leggings nearly collapsed as she was mega fit! hahah
 
British gas service contract? Yeah, I would go for it mate, lets face it I could never live up to the great service they provide for that amount each month, in fact I would go for the whole system care, cos in this day & age, you never know..
 
Mikey456 said:
We're only human, its allowed. Best one i ever had was going round the rooms to bleed the radiators youngish girl probably about 23ish had black leggings on and said "oh do you want me to bleed that one?, yeah go for it" because it was behind the bed jumped up on the bed with her arse facing me, seen straight through the leggings nearly collapsed as she was mega fit! hahah
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I think I'd have to go sit in the van till I stopped shaking!
 
Yeah I always use me lighter to look for gas leaks (for those who dont know me I use me rottenburger with mapp gas as a *** lighter)
 
I'm sorry Mrs Smith I'll be about an hour late, I'm just completing my 'we do trades' application on the web!
 
Hi just poped round from next door seen you were working here, i have a B & Q flex outside tap kit that,s leaking could you change it to a copper pipe and i will give you a tenner!!!!
 
pipeman- said:
Hi just poped round from next door seen you were working here, i have a B & Q flex outside tap kit that,s leaking could you change it to a copper pipe and i will give you a tenner!!!!
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Not a problem! There'll probably be some change as well!
 
croppie said:
I think I'd have to go sit in the van till I stopped shaking!
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Lucky i didnt feint onto the floor behind her! Coulda of been problems if i fell face first into her rse
 
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"No Mrs Smith, i think you've got the wrong end of the stick, matt allwright works for me in my marketing & promotions department"
 
this happend today

scuse me mate any chance i could borrow that drill when you've finished so i can put a hole through my wall for the tumble dryer save sticking it through window.

best bit is he lived about 3 doors away from where i was working cheeky sod
 
bod said:
this happend today

scuse me mate any chance i could borrow that drill when you've finished so i can put a hole through my wall for the tumble dryer save sticking it through window.

best bit is he lived about 3 doors away from where i was working cheeky sod
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Yen no problem I will do it for you when I wrap up here
 
Yes no problem i can fit your bathroom stuff /boiler you bought second hand off Ebay.

I get all my gear off the car boot sale

Sure you can still use the sink whilst I am fixing the trap.

Blocked toilet - you should go and see a doctor before you call the plumber

Is that bathroom suite supposed to be that cream colour or has it just not been cleaned for years?

Yes Mrs B, there seems to be a bad smell coming from the drain, oh wait perhaps you should try using the shower more often.

Don't know if the bath will take the weight of 3 people.

Wait I'll just go and get my dust cloth to put on your carpet to keep my overalls clean.

Yes love, you just go and have yourself a shower and I'l check there are no leaks from it.
 
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No its Fine mrs, i dont mind waiting an extra hour while you 'pop' to the cash point ! (they know your coming , they know the price beforehand but never have the money ready grrrr)
 
No love, barrier cream isn't for preventing unwanted pregnancies.

Hey man, d'y want some hemp?
 
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